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I want to be that mother who can stand up and say I am a strong confident mother and I know what is best for my children. We breastfeed and co sleep, We listen, We include, We eat chocolate and snot smoothies, we trampoline and grow frogs, we sling, we carry and we try and understand and work with our children without resorting to punishments, threats or coercion.

Friday 8 March 2013

If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy

We all have to live together. Lets just get on. Otherwise our days are filled with frustration, anger, stress and unhappiness. Just agree with what I say, think and do without question. Life will be great then. (For me).

 I do all the work round here.

If mama ain't happy, ain't no-one happy.


Only, I don't do ALL the work around here and compliance ain't that fun. And it creates unhappy people.

So.......we all have to live together. Lets just get on? Lets stop blaming. Lets stop hitting. Lets stop biting. Lets stop grabbing. Lets stop belittling. Lets stop name-calling. Lets stop forcing. Lets stop threatening. Lets stop bribing. Lets stop smacking. Lets stop shaming. Lets stop shouting. Lets stop nagging.

Lets stop.

Lets breathe.

Lets listen.

Lets talk about how we are feeling. Lets tell each other why we are feeling that way. If we don't know, let's just realise there is always a reason. It might be nothing to do with the other person. It might be related to something completely different. Its not always personal (unless it is, then lets talk about that too!) and, it's ok to show emotions. It's ok to feel anger, It's ok to feel frustrated. It's ok to feel sad. It's ok to feel disappointed. It's ok to feel everything. It's what we do with those feelings and how we direct them and how we deal with them that matters.

I'm trying...I really really am

The important thing is being happy




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After writing this I googled (damn you time sucking venomous devil) the phrase and below are most of the sites I read (there are tons, its a popular phrase.  The one that made me laugh the most was this one). FYI, I don't agree with everything that I read tonight and listed here. 

I do find it quite incredible that the top result was from the Unschooling site.  It has been influential (on and off, I seem unable to completely.....let go) in my parenting journey from the beginning.  


If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy - Sandra Dodd - Unschooling
If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy - Paul Elam - A Voice for Men
If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy - Dr Marlo Archer - Down to Earth
If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy - Jen C - Most Illustrious Mother
If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy - Ann Douglas - Canadian Living Moms 
If mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy - Heidi Shultz - Fratically Simple

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