I want to be that mother who can stand up and say I am a strong confident mother and I know what is best for my children. We breastfeed and co sleep, We listen, We include, We eat chocolate and snot smoothies, we trampoline and grow frogs, we sling, we carry and we try and understand and work with our children without resorting to punishments, threats or coercion.

Thursday, 17 October 2013

What's in a name?

Millie has been awake for 15minutes and has said mummy 25 times so far. Hubby hasn't left for work yet so she's said daddy 64 times. We waited with baited breath for her first mummy and daddy words and now I hold my breath and count to 10 to stop my brain from exploding with them. 

Today her mummy's meant:-

I'm wearing a towel
I'm stuck on toilet
I dropped lavender oil over bannister
I want milk
I've done a poo
Put this top on me
I've emptied this sewing box
I want milk 
I want to come down with you
I want some of that chocolate
I've hurt my foot
I want this open
I want milk 
Look I'm climbing the bookcase
Look I'm emptying the bookcase
I've fallen off the bookcase
I want this, it appears attached 
I'm upstairs you're not
You're in the shower not beside me 
I want milk
I like this milk 
Open this plastic box and fill it 
Look I'm standing in the dishwasher
Oh why did you close it
Lift me up
I want milk
Stop making dinner
I'm so happy playing with my sisters 
I'm overwhelmed they're chasing me
I didn't mean to bite Maia 
I'm tired
I'm hungry
I want that
Ellie made my nose bleed

By the time hubby got home, ten hours later, there were about 226 of them. That's roughly one every three minutes. 

Normally, I just hear an endless stream of mummeeeeee mummeeeeee mummeeeeee and by the end of the day I am near plot losing. From today's experiment, I see that I am not taking the time to actually HEAR what my little 18m old is telling me. I am not paying enough attention to be able to decipher her communications. She is SO desperate to talk, it must be SO frustrating for her not to have all the words yet and even worse to feel I am not listening to her. 

Who knew my baby had SO much to say?!!

Why not try pay attention to your mummeeeee's tomorrow and let me know what your baby is telling you!

Meltdowns - massive one on a bike ride
Losing the plot -  not massively but too much shouting 
Breastfeeding - lots

Friday, 4 October 2013

The time for the Truth....

Is the tooth fairy real?
Is the tooth fairy real?
Why are you asking?
I was thinking about my wobbly tooth and the money. 
Well your tooth goes under the pillow and you get money. 
Yeah but who does it?
What do you want to believe Ellie?
Is the tooth fairy real?
What do you think?
I think.....what do you think?
I think you're old enough now to make your own decision 
(Very quietly) You
(Bit louder) I think it's you
You think it's me do you?
You know I will always tell you the truth

Is that omission by silence!!!!?

One of the problems was that Maia was in the car with us and I didn't want to burst her bubble too!!

If she talks to me about it again I will tell her the truth because I don't believe in lying about these kind of things. 

Yesterday she asked me about Santa and as we don't celebrate Christmas, I explained what I do every year, that Santa is the story of a kind old man from long ago called Saint Nicholas who wanted to get presents for the orphaned children who didn't have any parents. I explain that different counties have different stories and ways to celebrate St Nick. I also tell them that in the 1940's the fizzy drinks company coca cola wanted to make more money and marketed ad designed an image of St Nick, made him look as he does now and called him Santa Claus. Although that's not strictly true either!

I explain how some parents use Santa as a way of making their kids behave around that time with the fear of not getting any presents and that it is a horrible thing to do. Finally we talk about how some children still like to believe that Santa is real and he does indeed deliver all the presents and it wasn't up to us to tell them different. That sometimes we have to play along with the game. 

What do you tell your kids about these characters?

Meltdowns - not too many this week
Plot Losing - an ugly one after a silly late night that pleased hubby ;)
Breastfeeding - I think she's coming down with something......

Wednesday, 2 October 2013

Mean Girls? NOOoooo not at this age

Bitchy behaviour scares me. 

There is this kid in my girls school who, and I'm not being paranoid, every time I walk by her she physically changes her demeanour and looks grumpy. She actually scowled at me today. She never smiles but today she actually changed her facial expression to one that I can only describe as, distaste. Then she looked grumpy again. I always thought she looked dreadfully sad and unhappy before. Today I just thought she was rude.  I told her so.

There is no way she really was bitchy. She's just a kid. She's full of complicated emotions that she doesn't know what to do with yet.    I should have looked past that triggering thought and wondered why she gave me the look, what was making her feel that way? 

All I could muster to say was, 'wow that was rude...and grumpy'. 

The thing is, she *is* just a kid. I don't even know her. Of course it's not about me! She's an unhappy girl with something on her mind. 

I wish now, I had said 'wow you look really unhappy, are you ok?'  

Meltdowns - Wow! They are so noisy
Losing the plot - been particularly calm recently
Breastfeeding - I'm loving it when she confuses herself with how many boobs there are and where they are!!