I want to be that mother who can stand up and say I am a strong confident mother and I know what is best for my children. We breastfeed and co sleep, We listen, We include, We eat chocolate and snot smoothies, we trampoline and grow frogs, we sling, we carry and we try and understand and work with our children without resorting to punishments, threats or coercion.

Saturday, 11 May 2013

Some people just say it so brilliantly...Episode 1

"Instead of saying the obvious, I would like to provide a tool to bring yourself to the present moment: Question the thoughts that take you
away from this moment. The thoughts that you must do something else, other than being present with your child.
Question the most “obvious” thoughts:
   I have to wash the dishes
   I must make dinner
   The laundry cannot wait
   I am tired
   My child is too demanding
   My children should play by themselves

While being with your child with your mind elsewhere, question your contrary thoughts:
   If I don’t think of it now, I will forget to do it later
   There is so much I need to do
   I wish I could go out (when your child plays indoors)
   I wish I could go home (when your child plays out at the playground)

The reason we get tired and stressed is not the child or the chores nor even the lack of sleep; it is the contrary thoughts about these.
Falling in love with this moment exactly the way it is makes life easy and vital.

The ability to bring yourself to this moment takes practice (questioning your thoughts) because your mind’s program is to want something other
than this moment. If your child is demanding, she learned from you to seek another moment. This is not a reason to feel guilty, but to wake up
to this beautiful moment and take responsibility for what you create. Responsibility is not guilt. Responsibility is action. The flowers are
wilting, no guilt for forgetting to water them. Just action: water the flowers.

When you find yourself devoted to what is not, or to avoiding this moment, or avoiding your child, instead of indulging the thoughts of guilt,
forgive yourself kindly, and bring yourself back to the moment. Looking deep into your child’s eyes is one of the best ways to recapture the
now." Naomi Aldort 

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