We have two weeks, two weeks of not forcing Maia to get up in the morning, not forcing Maia to get dressed in the morning, not forcing Maia to get into her car seat in the morning, not forcing Maia to get dressed again in the afternoon, not forcing Maia to get into her car seat again in the afternoon.
By not forcing Maia, I mean spending an inordinate amount of time asking Maia to get dressed, asking Maia to choose her clothes which she usually won't, so I have to, asking Maia to come over here so I can help her get dressed because I need her help her do it because my pain is so bad I can't chase after her, bend down to her properly, or generally move properly. So I become frustrated and agitated and eventually end up essentially holding her down in order to get her clothes on whilst simultaneously screaming that its impossible to get her dressed if she doesn't help a little bit. - I have recently seen Maia dress herself a couple of times, so I know she can. I think the offer of going somewhere she wanted to was on the table and so she needed to be dressed.
By not forcing Maia into her car seat I mean, literally grabbing her by whatever I can catch and shoving her into her seat whilst simultaneously shouting about how “I don't understand why she has to make things so difficult, we are going to be late for x, y, z. Its damn near impossible to get you in the seat because of my pain and if you just got in yourself instead of faffing about climbing through to the front, trying to turn it into a game of 'I go in front you goes in back' ad infinitum I wouldn't end up freaking out.” I know its a really long sentence, but it flows really easily off an irate tongue.
This is not how I want to parent, its becoming all to easy to be that shouty mum again.
So two week, two weeks of not having to get up, get dressed, go in the car and be somewhere for a specific time.
G-d Dammit, school is stressing me and my 3year old. And YES I do blame school!!
Now to work on my 'non shouty I need help around the house, stop dropping your crap on the floor, put your dishes in the kitchen, help me empty the dishwasher' mama persona.
Meltdowns - increasing for obvious reasons
Losing the Plot - abound for obvious reasons
Breastfeeding - not so much for obvious reasons