Food food glorious.....fuck off

I've had it up to here ^^^ with the girls and their ridiculous food fussiness, I'm sick of making food that doesn't get eaten or refusing foods they ate only the other day or eating the same crappy pasta, waffles or veggie sausages. 

So yesterday, when they came home from school I said this is what's going to happen. We are going to walk the dog then when we come back, there will be no tv (another contentious issue) and I'm taking each of you into the kitchen and you are going to make your dinner, with my help. Well Ellie decided she wanted pasta (*sigh*) and a tomato based sauce which she opened splattered all over the kitchen and ate half of before changing her mind and going for pesto. So she folks her pasta, adds chopped tomato and goes off happily. Maia decides she wants chips and mini waffles, I can't persuade her to add anything to it, so it's done. She lies on the floor in the kitchen waiting for ten mins to pass, turns them over, then waits some more. All good. Perhaps?

Today I tried the same approach. Millie wanted scrambled eggs. She will usually eats whatever I make and loves to help make it so she is not a problem. Maia says she wants scrambled eggs too but just as I'm spooning it onto the plate she changes her mind and walks away. I call her several times that her lunch is in the table but she ignores me. I go into the living room and say 'why are you ignoring me, that just makes me really upset. Your lunch is on the table'. She eats a few mouthfuls and says she is full. Rileydog is happy. 

Ellie comes into the kitchen and says she doesn't like this new way. She wants waffles. I ask her to get them and put the oven on. She hasn't done it so far. 

Im at a loss with what to do. I hate standing in the kitchen with literally no clue what to make only to have it not eaten. I thought they would enjoy spending the time with me doing cooking stuff but seriously my kids are on a lazy town making mummy crazy path and there's no stopping them.

I'm sick of being treated like the skivvy. I'm sick of being ignored. I'm sick of being under appreciated. I'm sick of having to shout at them before they hear me and I'm sick of them still ignoring me even when I am shouting at them. Most of all I'm sick of my behaviour always directly affecting theirs. Can't I be in a mood without them reacting to it. I hate the pressure. I have to be calm and rational when they kick off!!

Suffice to say things are a bit of a mess down this way just now and I'm flailing. 

Meltdowns - instantaneous at the moment

Losing the plot - sarcasm switch needs breaking 

Breastfeeding - OMFG leave me alone